Especially, not now

It’s an awful lot of pressure lately and it’s too much for me to handle especially now that I am expecting. All my life I have been dependent as a leech on my parents and well off sisters and this time, I want to do it my own but I never knew it’s a pressure cooker to hear cyclic suggestions on how to do stuff. But I feel like I owe my family a lot already for me not to follow every word they say and imply. Obliging would be the best possible thing to do but I hate to use the word “oblige” except that it’s how I feel. I still want to do the things I want to do but I reckon it’s not what they want and would agree on. But at the back of my head I hear a hint from mr. super ego that maybe this time it should not be the protagonist id anymore who has to play the leading role…Maybe it’s right time to listen to my liberators, to those people who have done everything for me without asking anything in return except for good news maybe. I don’t know. And see, it’s always I don’t know for me. So, I don’t know. I hate pressure, especially not now.

It’s not everyday I am comic or I can paste that mocking grin on my well-animated face, especially not now. To see a pregnant woman cry in despair and agony of how miserable things have turned out to be is a heartbreaker especially if she tries locking herself in the four cornered well-carpeted CR to evade sympathy from those who might be around. But the thing is, restrooms echo.

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